We all know that social media isn’t reality, but it can still be hard to remember that sometimes. Whatever your life stage, there’s someone on Instagram who seems to have perfected it. New moms who look well-rested lovingly playing with their darling babies in well-appointed nurseries. Young professional women with cute Prada shoes attending swanky New York City events. Or beautiful couples welcoming guests to their extravagant weddings on the Amalfi Coast.
Personally, there’s one category that stresses me out the most: successful female entrepreneurs. On any given day, Instagram serves me up dozens of fabulous women who are building super cool businesses. They’re invited to speak at all the girl boss conferences. Their hair is perfect, and their clothes are gorgeous. And—what makes me the most envious—they seem to have unlimited funds to invest in their companies.
Not going to lie: I often find myself googling these founders to try to figure out where they get their funding. Do they have a rich husband or parent? Did they raise a seed round I didn’t hear about? Or are they just better at this than I am?
We don’t often see the other side of entrepreneurship—when things don’t go as planned. And that’s one of the reasons I wanted to publish today’s Home Economics. Our writer, a 39 year-old single woman living in New York City, tried to start her own business a few years ago after getting laid off from two jobs in two years. It didn’t go as planned, and she ran up quite a bit of debt when she was unemployed and trying to launch her business.
Social media often makes it look easy. Hang up a shingle (or build a website), make some Reels, and the clients—and cash—will start rolling in. But it rarely gets into the muck and mire of being a solo entrepreneur—especially when you’re a single woman. If you’re not in a relationship with a partner who can help support you—or you don’t have family money—you have to pay for everything. Rent, health care, groceries, plus start-up costs. It’s a lot!
I dream of living in a world where every entrepreneur has to be up front about how they could afford to launch a business. For me, I have a husband with a full-time job that provides health insurance, we have relatively low expenses and a hefty nest egg thanks to years of living below our means while earning two incomes, and I freelanced the first two years of running The Purse. I’m boot-strapping this business, which means I have to make tough decisions every day about what I can spend money on. It’s really hard!
I really appreciate today’s writer for being so open about her experience. Despite the debt, I think this is a really hopeful edition of Home Economics.
Want to share your story? Fill out the form here. Or respond to this email, and I can send you a Google doc with the questions.
Age: 39
Location: New York City
Relationship status: Single
About me: Throughout my adult life, I’ve had a varied career history. In my 20s, I worked a lot of freelance and service industry gigs before landing roles at two different start-ups that ultimately turned out to be toxic for various reasons. After the last layoff, I worked for myself for a couple of years and struggled to make ends meet as a single woman living in New York City. Currently, I work as a restaurant server, which allows me to have more flexibility, and I’m focused on paying off my debt while still trying to live my life.
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Income:
- Your job title/salary: I’m a restaurant server, and I make $11.50 an hour before tips. I work a minimum of four days a week, and I average an income of around $100,000 a year.
- Your monthly take-home pay (paycheck amount after taxes and other deductions): It depends on how many shifts I work and how much I make in tips, but it averages between $5,200 and $6,400.
- Additional monthly income (side hustles, part-time jobs, rental income, etc.): Maybe $300 a month if I pick up a random event gig or teaching. I teach workshops about our relationship with money, but that work has been mostly on hiatus for a year.
- Total monthly income: My average monthly income is around $5,949, but I budget for $5,229, because that’s what I need to cover my expenses.
