Home Economics No. 44: Single, 34, with $30,000 in credit card debt

Hello! Before we jump into today’s Home Economics, two small asks:

1. I’m still looking for people to participate in the date night story for Yahoo! You can fill out the form here.
2. I don’t think we can blame mercury in retrograde, but Alicia changed the setting on the Work History form, and as a result, she lost the email addresses from the first 17 people who submitted entries. Eek! If you submitted your Work History, can you just reply to this email, and she will get back to you! Thank you!

And now on to today’s Home Economics!

Last July, we published a Home Economics featuring a single woman living in New Orleans. Readers took a bit of issue with the fact that I referred to her as single, as she had a long-term boyfriend who often picked up the bill when they went out to dinner. Even though they didn’t live together, and she paid her own rent and car insurance, commenters felt she had a safety net that truly single women don’t have.

In the intro, I asked for more submissions from single women—and Purse readers really showed up. Since July, we’ve published four more Home Economics featuring single women (and of those, three of the writers were not in relationships), and we’ve got another one today.

Single in Boston makes a six-figure salary, and she has $100,000+ in retirement savings and $30,000 in consumer debt. This will be the first time I haven’t put a Home Ec featuring credit card debt behind a paywall, so I’m asking you all to be kind in the comments. It isn’t easy to talk about debt, and I really admire how open and honest today’s writer is about her experience. She has a very different perspective on money than many of the other entries we’ve featured.

She’s also far from alone when it comes to her debt. The average credit card balance in the U.S. was $7,886 at the end of 2025, according to Lending Tree, and 46% of Americans carried a balance at least one month during the past year.

We’re striving to tell all kinds of money stories on The Purse. Please consider sharing your entry, too. Here’s the link. (Updated slightly for the new year!)

Age: 34
Location: Boston
Relationship status: Single

About me: I’m a single, ace queer woman living outside of Boston. I work in marketing. Despite being successful in my career goals, I try to make that the least interesting thing about me. I have a great group of friends here, and I’m very intentional about spending time with them. I also travel quite a bit, both as part of my job and for fun.

Editor’s Note: This entry was originally written in August 2025, but there are a few small updates noted throughout. All expenses are monthly unless otherwise stated.

Income:

1. Your job title/salary: Senior marketing manager, $150,000
2. Your monthly take-home pay (paycheck amount after taxes and other deductions): $8,777
3. Other income: ~$50/month from travel-advising commissions. I love to travel and plan trips. Once I realized this is not something everyone enjoys, I joined a travel-advising agency and make a 7% commission on booking hotels and rental cars. I mostly help friends and family at this stage.
4. Total monthly income: ~$8,827

Account balances:

5. Checking account balance: I collect the majority of my twice-monthly paychecks into my checking account and then allocate the money on the first of the month for rent, credit card bills, and savings, with a small buffer. So the amount in checking varies from $200 to $9,000, depending on the time of the month. I also have a separate checking account for car expenses, into which I deposit $500 a month, which covers my monthly car payment ($365) and my car sinking fund ($135).
6. Savings account balance:
   • $3,675 in my “combined” savings account for sinking funds (see below for more details)
   • $1,600 in my car savings account
7. High-yield savings account balance: $5,500 at 3.88% APY
8. Monthly contribution to savings account: $1,115 to various sinking funds (see below)
9. Retirement account(s) balance: $122,000 over a few accounts
   • 401(k)/403(b): $96,000
   • Roth IRA: $8,000 in Roth IRA
   • IRA: $18,000
10. Monthly contribution to retirement accounts: Currently on pause; I just started a new job, and there’s a probationary period before I can contribute to the 401(k) plan. (January 2026 update: I started to contribute 7% following the probationary period, and my employer offers a 4% match.)
11. Investment account balance: $25,000 in brokerage accounts
12. Monthly contribution to investment accounts: Currently zero
13. Emergency fund balance: I consider $2,700 of the $5,500 in my HYSA to be earmarked for emergencies.
14. Goals-oriented savings account balances (sinking funds): I started creating “sinking funds” several years ago—I’m not sure where I first heard about it; probably on Instagram. I’ve found it useful in helping me save for bigger and recurring expenses.
    • Travel: $250 (I recently spent a lot from this account. I contribute $320 each month.)
    • Gifts: $175 (contribute $40 each month)
    • 40th birthday party: $2,700 (contribute $150 each month)
    • Yearly expenses: $550 (contribute $200 each month)
    • Car expenses: $1,600 (contribute $135 each month)
15. Other accounts: I have $2,160 in I-bonds. I started buying them in July 2022, and I purchase $55 worth each month.

Total in checking, savings, and investment accounts: $159,935

Housing:

16. Size of your home: I’ve lived in the same one-bedroom, one-bathroom apartment since I moved to Boston seven years ago, and it is now under market rate since most of the units in the neighborhood have been renovated in the intervening years. I’d like more space, but I am reluctant to increase my rent obligation.
17. Rent: $2,626
18. Year you moved into your apartment: 2018
19. How many times has your landlord raised the rent: When I moved in, my rent was $1,990, and the landlord has increased the rent four times:
    • 2019: $200-per-month increase
    • 2020: no rent increase because they were having trouble filling empty units during the pandemic
    • 2021: $200-per-month increase
    • 2022: $100-per-month increase
    • 2023: $130-per-month increase

In 2024, there was no increase because I signed a 15-month lease. I negotiated a $25 decrease in 2025 due to a discrepancy over parking space availability. While I’ve been living in the complex, many of the other units have been renovated. I realized that one of the renovated one-bedroom units was renting for less than I pay for an unrenovated unit, so I negotiated a $130-per-month decrease in 2026, so my rent is going down to $2,495 in the new year.

20. Renters insurance: $140 per year
21. Electricity and gas: ~$200. The distribution fluctuates per season but adds up to about the same total.
22. Water: $45
23. Cell phone: N/A. I’m still on a family plan with my parents.
24. Internet: $70
25. Housekeeper: I’m currently looking for a new housekeeper and have budgeted $200 a month.
26. Gardener: N/A

Transportation:

27. Monthly car payment: $335. I am about halfway through a 60-month loan with a 7.99% APR for a used sedan I purchased in 2023.
28. Car insurance payment: $1,400 every six months
29. Gas: $55. I have a plug-in hybrid, and I can charge it for free at work. One full charge gets me to and from work, so I’m effectively not paying for gas for my commute. I also budget $60 a month for tolls to and from work.
30. Car maintenance: I don’t budget for this.
31. Parking: It costs $420 to park at the office, but my employer subsidizes $225, and my out-of-pocket is $195.
32. Monthly public transportation: N/A. I don’t take public transportation very often.
33. Ride shares (Uber, taxi, etc.): ~$75. I use these sparingly and prefer to drive.

Children:

34. Number of children and their ages: I don’t have kids, and I don’t plan to. I’m enjoying my role as the fun aunt!

Debts:

35. Student loan total balance: $0. I did not take out any loans for undergrad; most of my expenses were covered by a variety of scholarships, and my parents paid for the rest. My graduate program was fully funded.
36. Credit card balance (if you carry a balance month to month): $30,000. Earlier this year, I took advantage of a balance transfer offer with 0% APR until May 2026. This is the second time I’ve transferred this balance, and I’m hoping to pay it down in this time period.
    
    (January 2026 update: I’ve since moved this balance to a three-year personal loan. I now have fixed monthly payments of $1,000, and there’s no penalty for early pay off. I’m hoping that having a regular monthly payment with an end date will help me finally pay off this balance.)
37. Credit card minimum monthly payment: ~$700

Food:

38. Groceries: $400 for a prepared meal delivery kit that covers lunch and dinner, plus ~$150 in traditional grocery expenses (mostly breakfast food and coffee). I just shop at my local grocery, or I use Instacart. Nothing fancy!
39. Dining out: ~$625, which includes restaurant meals, takeout (often coffee on the way to work or a pastry on the way home), and a little too much Doordash.

Socializing and entertainment:

40. Subscriptions (streaming services, magazines, etc.):
    • Hulu: $83
    • Bouqs (fresh flowers): $48
    • Substack subscriptions: $30
    • MeUndies: $16
    • Equilibria CBD: $46
41. Memberships (museums, social clubs, etc.):
    • Museum of Science: $25 (this is a monthly donation, and I receive membership to the museum as a benefit)
    • Patreon: $11
    • I previously had a membership to a massage place and a float studio, but I wasn’t going enough to continue justifying it, so now I just pay ad hoc when I want either of these (reflected in the self-care section).
42. Movies, concerts, other events: N/A. This is a small part of the “events” category in my budget, which I discuss below.
43. Entertaining and socializing other: N/A. Also falls under the “events” category in my budget.
44. Travel: I love to travel. The expenses below are primarily just for hotels and transportation.
    • 10-day trip to Australia: $4,400. I had two weeks off between jobs, and I decided at the last minute to take this trip.
    • Local convention weekend: $805
    • Weekend trip to D.C: $480 for the hotel and train ticket
    • Weekend trip to NYC: $188. I used points to pay for the hotel, so this is only the train ticket.
    • Weekend trip to upstate New York: $188. I drove, so this is just the cost of the hotel.
    • Extra expenses from work trip: $128 for extra food, airport snacks, and souvenirs, etc., which aren’t covered by corporate policy
    • I’ve also prepaid ~$400 for trips coming up in late 2025 and early 2026.

Miscellaneous:

45. Clothing: ~$2,300 so far in 2025 (seven months). This does not include souvenir clothing from travel. It does include a lot of trips to the thrift store as well as Poshmark, the two places where I predominantly shop for clothes.
46. Home supplies: $85 from my budget category called “Home,” which includes supplies and decor
47. Exercise: I spent $49 on a trial membership to a local yoga studio, which will be reimbursed by my health insurance. Otherwise, I’m not big on exercise, and that’s compounded by some health conditions that make it hard to find fitness that works for me. I recently started physical therapy ($45 copay per visit) to help here. So far, the PT averages about $135 a month.
48. Personal and self-care (haircuts, manicures, massages, etc.): $350. These are some of my highest monthly expenses. I get a monthly massage, a mani-pedi at a salon approximately every three weeks, and a haircut about twice per year. I bleach/dye my hair at home three to four times per year. I also spend $660 a month for therapy.
49. Pet expenses: N/A. I don’t have pets.
50. Donations: $11 to a science education nonprofit, where I also volunteer.
51. Tithing: N/A
52. Events (birthday parties, etc.): ~$75. I have a budget category called “events,” which covers expenses like concert tickets, conventions, and local events.
53. Other: So far this year I have spent $325 on books, crafts, and toys; $355 on gifts for others; and ~$500 on games (including board games, video games, and escape rooms). It is hard to accurately average this out per month because most of these categories are represented by a few large purchases (e.g. board games are typically >$100 each!).

Insurance:

54. Life insurance: N/A
55. Health insurance: ~$50/month deducted pre-tax for health, dental, and vision insurance through my employer
56. FSA contribution: N/A. My new job does not support an FSA. When I had a job that did, I maxed out this account.
57. Other insurance costs: ~$55 for over-the-counter and prescription medications

Total monthly spending (includes annual expenses divided by 12; totals are rounded to nearest dollar): $7,845

Tell us more:

58. What are your top financial priorities?
    Paying off my credit card debt. The amount has slowly been creeping up over the past several years, and I’ve been prioritizing having fun and making life easier for myself instead of paying attention to this. Recently, I’ve found it to be always in the back of my mind, and I would feel better if I at least saw the amount decreasing a little bit each month.
    
    I was nervous to share this, because I know people can be very critical about people with credit card debt. And it’s not easy to explain how I got into this much debt. There’s part of me that’s like, “Well I don’t know how it happened.” And then there’s part of me that can see the small expenses that add up.
    
    There are also some big expenses—like therapy—that I don’t save for separately but spend on regularly. I’m spending around $8,000 a year on therapy out of pocket, and I’ve been going for two years. But what am I supposed to do—never go to another restaurant or on another trip so I can afford therapy? That’s not a sustainable option for me.
59. How do you feel about your current financial situation?
    I recently got a new job with a slight pay increase, and I’m getting paid twice a month instead of every other week. Both of these changes have been surprisingly impactful on my month-to-month finances. I feel like my financial situation is improving. I’m also happy with where my net worth is at, despite the credit card debt.
60. What are your money stressors?
    One, credit card debt, and two, the thought of not being able to enjoy life in the moment—such as traveling, hobbies, and taking some of the burden off managing a household on my own. I find it easy to justify spending that makes my daily life better.
61. Do you expect to receive (or have you received) an inheritance from a family member?
    I received $2,500 when one of my grandparents passed away; I used some of it to purchase my dining room furniture and most of the rest on a trip a few years ago in memory of my grandparents, who loved traveling to the Caribbean. I’m sure I will receive something when my parents pass, but hopefully that is a long time off and not something I want to think about or plan for. (And I have told my parents I’d rather they spend the money and enjoy retirement!)
62. Do you receive any financial support from your family?
    I’m on my parents’ family plan for my cell phone, and we also share logins to a lot of streaming services, such as HBOMax, Paramount+, Peacock, and Spotify.
63. Do you financially support any family members beyond yourself and your nuclear family?
    I don’t. My parents are very well set up for retirement, and my siblings are younger but both in successful jobs and living on their own.
64. How does being single impact how you manage your money?
    There are some obvious ways that this impacts my expenses: I pay the full cost of rent and my car, for example, whereas I have friends in relationships who split the equivalent costs of a one-bedroom apartment and one car. There are some less obvious ways that society isn’t set up for single people: I can rarely finish an entire loaf of bread or carton of milk before it goes bad, for example, so there’s money spent on wasted food. A unique expense that I think comes with being single is an “extra set of hands”—such as paying for prepared meals, food delivery, and a house cleaner, since I don’t have anyone to share the burden of these daily activities with.
65. What is one financial goal(s) you still want to achieve?
    I would like to pay off the $30,000 in credit card debt that I referenced earlier. I try to be pretty neutral about money, but maybe I take it too far. It’s not like I ignore the numbers. I track all my expenses. I just don’t feel super strongly about them. Like everyone, there are times when I spend money on things I shouldn’t have. Like, I really didn’t enjoy eating that Burger King meal, but I was so hungry, and I was driving all day, and I just needed something. So I just try not to make myself feel bad about an expense like that. I don’t think of my debt as a moral failing. It’s not like I blew $30,000 during a weekend in Vegas.
    
    But feeling neutral about my debt isn’t helping me get out of it. I don’t feel motivated to pay it off. That’s one of the reasons I ended up moving the credit card debt to a personal loan. Now I have a clear monthly payment and an end goal.
    
    I’m also saving up for a big 40th birthday party. I put $150 into a savings account each month, and my goal is $10,000. I want to cover the expense of the party and, if possible, the cost of travel for friends and family. I turned 30 during Covid, so I didn’t get to have a big party then. And I’m not having kids or getting married, so this is my big thing. I want to make it really special.
66. Tell us about one financial accomplishment you’re proud of.
    I was inspired by reading Financial Feminist and following Her First $100K on Instagram, so I was proud when I crossed $100,000 in retirement savings in Q1 of 2025.
67. What do you regret spending your money on the most?
    Honestly, I mulled over this question for a long time, and nothing came to mind. I generally am not a person who regrets anything, and I believe that things happen for a reason, which includes purchases that may not have been the ideal use of money but served a purpose in a situation. For better or worse, I very much live in the present.
68. What is one thing you spend money on that makes your life better?
    Having a housecleaner. (I really need to find a new one!) My biggest stressor is keeping up with my household tasks. I absolutely hate vacuuming and taking out the trash! It is really nice to outsource this.
69. What is one thing you spend money on that drives you crazy?
    Doordash. I don’t like cooking, and it’s too easy to have hot food delivered right to my door! I am especially tempted by this on late nights or weekend mornings when I’m tired and hungry. Knowing this is half the battle, right?
70. Is there anything else you would like to add?
    I filled this out after you posted the Single in New Orleans diary. I think I will only be the second partner- and child-free submission. I’m not sure how many other queer women have participated, but I don’t see that mentioned frequently either. I hope that I’m able to represent to The Purse readers!

(Editor’s note: As I mentioned in the intro, we published four additional entries from single women in 2025. But the writer is correct: This entry may only be our second Home Economics featuring a queer woman. We’re always striving to tell a diverse range of stories, and we so appreciate everyone who submits their story!)

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